Superior

Wow 2 posts in one day..rare case huh?!..I just found out that tomorrow is a public holiday here in KL...nice huh?! ahah..but I'm not sure whether it's applicable to us or not since there are a few things that my senior asked me to get it done by tomorrow...so now I'm worried that I may not be able to get them done hahaha..anyway that is not the real reason I'm making yet another post today...well I confirmed tomorrow's public holiday from my colleague..let's not share her detail here..but our conversation earlier makes me want to turn my laptop and continue typing here...so I've known her since the very first week I entered this new journey...and for the past few weeks I'm in the same engagement as her..but I joined a bit later, in fact she's actually has been involved with the engagement since last year..so basically she has more experienced in dealing with this client...but client wasn't really an issue here..well we did have some tasks left on hand due to the delay in obtaining the documents..but so far they have been quite responsive..so I would say..they are far from being listed in one of those "nasty client" 's list...however...the issue here is due to my very own nightmare...so back during my first engagement in EY... I went through a series of breakdown right?..and part of it is due to my lack of experience, lack of knowledge in this industry..lack of understanding on how everything is carried out around here..and the biggest portion of it is due to my reviewer..remember?? yup that very same person apparently is her current reviewer for this engagement...Let's name her "Mrs A" and my colleague "Ms N"..I did hold myself from saying bad stuff about Mrs A but really...to know that somebody else has to go through what I went through..for some reason it hurts me again..maybe because of the fact that I know this person, so it affects me in a way or so...honestly I don't even know where to start..cause this nightmare doesn't happen to me but to Ms N.. 

When I joined the engagement, I knew that Ms N has played a big part in managing our works..since she has more experience, having been in the engagement since last year..so some of the higher up kinda depend on her to handle most of the works..but sadly she was assigned to a bit toooo much works...but she pull herself well throughout the engagement..despite all the tasks assigned to her, no matter how busy she is..she still able to help us the newcomers in the engagement to deal with all the jargons and weird workings from client...in fact even before I joined, she has been helping me to chase the client to get some documents earlier, so that by the time I join, I can straight away start my work...and thanks to that, I did finish my tasks quite early...so where is the problem again?? 

Well the problem is her hardwork were not appreciated or acknowledged..Mrs A even give a poor feedback to her, saying things like she didn't perform her job well, her works is incomplete...yadda yadda yadda...but really how do you expect people to complete all the tasks given when normally in such an engagement we are usually booked for only a week or two..but the tasks are for at least a month engagement.. not just that, I may not know well about Ms N work's progress...but I can clearly see how dedicated she was throughout the engagement..all day AND NIGHT..in fact including weekends... to brush off people efforts just like that, it is just super demotivating..and as somebody with a higher position, I find that attitude is a bit improper right?? yes I'm not voicing this concern in the right channel..Yup! I'm just a coward who hides behind this keyboard..but Ms N not like that, cause today she burst!!..thus the true reason why I make this post hahah..

As mentioned, our conversation leads to this post right..so basically our conversation is about her venting her frustration and unfairness regarding Mrs A.. today, SUNDAY..a day that suppose to be an off day to ALMOST EVERYONE...those assigned under Mrs A have to go through another review session..the first review session she had with them was last Thursday..oh yeah another holiday (Thaipusam) a day where people expect to take a break from their work..so they booked Mrs A's time for 30 minutes to 1 hour session each..however Ms N went through the review session from 8am till 11am..yeah...and they have an argument that last for almost 1 hour hahaha..so what it is about? Ms N told me that she just want to hold on to her rights, she said she had enough of Mrs A putting the blame on her and not helping to find solutions to any issues highlighted..she also stated that she mentioned my name and one more colleague that help her out to complete the tasks assigned..Mrs A said something like this instead.."I've give you people, you should take advantage of that"...Ms N was pissed off because she doesn't want to boss us around since we are in the same rank..and as someone that helping her out..honestly I don't mind if she delegate more tasks but having known that Mrs A said something like that, treating us as an object, a tool?! it does sparks some anger in me too..Mrs A expect us to be like her..able to boss others and hoping that everything is settle her way is just absurd...Ms N told me that she had enough and hang up the call with Mrs A stating that their meeting/discussion is going nowhere and only repeating the same thing without having a proper solution..I'm lucky this time around cause my reviewer seriously doesn't say much..it does worries me at time...but I just hope I actually did my job well thus no issue being point out by my reviewer..however, I don't know how I can help Ms N to get out of her negative shell that Mrs A build...she built the same shell around me once...it is painful and something that I wish nobody else face it..sadly, my own friend..have to face the same thing..the same Nightmare...but the only thing I can assure her is that, once she's able to break that shell..she can be stronger and be more prepared both physical and mentally to face the next engagement... her last message to me was that, she feels like a loser, she's ashamed with all of us thinking that she's stupid for not able to get things right..

I'm not a counselor neither a great motivator...but I can tell her this instead...although you may not read my blog..I just want to let you know.. I'm proud of what you did throughout the engagement..I'm impressed with your ability to stand up for yourself..your strength to continue working and performing your tasks despite everything that happened...you may be filled with too many negativity since that is what she has been feeding you with...but put your spoon down for a second and sip some warm tea to calm yourself, look where you are now, where you have guide us, THE WHOLE TEAM...you have shown, at least to me, what a good leader you will be... everybody makes mistake..don't be too harsh on yourself.. we are just a few steps into this journey..there are more steps to take, more paths to follow, more blockage to clear...and of course more memories to make..so take a deep breath..only with a clear mind we can make a wise decision...All the best to you and everyone who's facing similar issue like this.

Goodnight~

Sebulan sudah..aduhh

 Haih cepat sungguh masa berlalu...last post cakap pasai balik Kedah...baru masuk bulan 1 seminggu dah duty call suruh balik KL..kononnya ada kemungkinan kena ke tempat client..NOH!! balik2 PKP lagi sekali, tempat client pun tutup haihh...tapi cerita pasai kerja satgi2 sambung len..ni nak cerita apa jadi throughout sebulan ni...dang sebulan dah 2021..harapan nak situasi makin ok..duk nampak cam makin teruk ja..daily cases makin duk naik ada la...PKP sekarang cam dah tak da effect..tapi entah la..nak cakap lebih2 semua orang hadap benda lain2 kan..for me I'm still lucky since I still receive monthly pay..still mampu beli barang dapuq, bayaq hutang every month...plus staying in this area although cam tak banyak benda tapi ada easy access to online stores rather than some of my friends yang terpaksa keluaq rumah semata2 nak beli barang dapuq and etc..but yeah tu pilihan masing2 la kan..so yeah~ back to our topic..macam tahun2 yang lepas January is the busiest month sebab suma laki dalam family ni dilahirkan bulan ni...not only that, my parent punya anniversary pun bulan ni jugak so 4 events kau~!>..< 

So first event of the month..birthday Along.. 5th January 2021.. waktu ni Alhamdulillah ina masih di Kedah ahahha...plan macam nak gila nak buat apa eh untuk birthday Along..masalah lagi sebab kami di Kedah depa kat Penang, nak order online tak brapa reti masing2...acah nak try surprise event tu tengok mostly untuk delivery kat KL huhu..yang kat Penang dah problem last minute order plak..lama gak la planning last2 baru la Alang nak gtau kawan dia ada juai brownies buat surprise2 event ni pun boleh..-_- bukan nak gtau awai2..and "surprisingly" the surprise menjadi ahhahaha so tengok ja la gambaq..and vid maybe heheh

Honestly nak letak vid surprise tu..tapi takpa la kita simpan utk blackmail nanti2 ja la

the surprise

muka tak semegah abang kami yang dah makin tua

thank you kawan alang..owner mai hantaq sendiri gitew

gambaq dalam IG @mawarputihkitchen

kami yang kat Kedah..@watiermankitchen ja la eh

2nd event is anniversary mama and abah 15th January 2021..so this time ina dah ada kat KL..so memang tak plan apa2 pun..cuma pagi tu kami suma as usual video call satu family hahaha..then ttiba kak ifah kata..dia dah order something actually untuk mama and abah ahhaha..this time hasil karya kawan kak ifah pulak..and again kawan kak Ifah sendiri yang pi hantaq hahaha..bagus la ampa suma ni banyak kawan..haih ina ngan Along yang slalu mati kutu tak tau nak cari mana hahahha..so again enjoy the pic

Event ni pun ada vid..pun kita simpan untuk blackmail di masa hadapan lah eh

sempoi la mak pak kami ni ahhaha

 kalau tengok betul2 kami buat peace dalam fon tu hahha

sedap ja nampak kek tu huhu

acah sgt shot ni

hehe sesupriss

eh2..nama sapa tu hmm

Happy Anniversary~

thank you kawan kak Ifah..tak sure plak nama apa nak promo

The next event ni kinda combine event la sebab sebelah2 27th & 28th January 2021... birthday Alang and Abah respectively.. k event depa ni agak kabut sebab Mama ja yang boleh tau kalau nak buat surprise..tapi Mama plak tak reti nak order2 ni..and then kami plak cam dah tak brapa nak buat surprise events cam awal2 tu sebab ya la dah dua surprise events kan..haih cukup la kot..tapi cam kesian plak ahhaha..Ina pun ngan busy kerja tak dan nak proper plan out nak buat apa suma tu...malam sebelum tu ja sempat call Along tanya..tengok secret recipe tak da plak untuk delivery ke rumah..official website tak semua ada delivery service..PULAK DAH! haihh..then Along tengok food panda kot..ada option untuk baskin robbins..tapi malam tu cam tak finalise apa2 pun haha..tengah malam kami group call Alang..then sampai Ina pengsan on my own la depa punya menyembang...esok tu tengah kerja Along tanya jadi ka dak dia nak place order..hopefully sampai la ke rumah..sebab yeah another problem..alamat rumah tak leh detect through grab or foodpanda..yang lawaknya sebab awai2 tu Ina dah kata kat Mama..tak jadi kot ma nak beli kek kat Alang sebab tak leh detect alamat hahah..betul2 lepas letak telefon..selang beberapa minit..kak Ifah hntaq mesej kata delivery dah sampai.. tapi since Abah ada dekat office lagi waktu tu tak tau la depa sambung celebrate lepas Abah balik kerja ka dak..hahah kami yang duduk jauh ni yang lagi excited sebab asyik2 kami asyik buat group call ja hahaha... so again enjoy the pic

Malangnya event ni takda vid tapi takpa..banyak benda len boleh digunakan untuk blackmail mereka2 ini muahahah~

sampe sudahh~

kek ver mama 

sempena 28 tahun 8 benua kita bagi

happy birthday

the lucky star in the family

bukti kami mengganggu dari jauh sentiasa ahahha

I scream cake!!

before Ina balik KL..Abah beli rib for us to BBQ!!..

Alang in action

pwetty fire

susun2

Daging Queue

some veges as side

marvelous..siap dapat bawak balik jadi bekal la

Don't judge..I'm just eating it the right way

slamat~

khusyuk jangan kacau

orang suma kena ada laman luaih2..kami cukup sekadar garage parking comel ni haha

bila time makan..automatic rambut diikat supaya tak mengganggu process ya

makan2

^_^

Thank you <3

so back to my life here in KL huhu..so balik2 ja dari Kedah..dengan bekalan2 yang agak memenuhkan kereta..4 trip gak la naik turun angkut barang

periuk nasi

kain balut papan seterika

vacuum "DYSON"

bekalan2 lain smpai 2 trolley penuh la..

hadiah dari Mama..bukan yg dpan ni..acuan dia samaq2 blakang tu hahah

tak cukup garing at first try tapi rasa cukup la masin manis tu hehe

Hasil dia..Alhamdulillah ada jugak la bentuk..Mama simpan kat dia bentuk senang..dibaginya noobies ni bentuk bunga truih adoyai

but it is worth it..hehe..insyallah kalau ada masa lapang in the near future akan buat lagi..
But for today Ina dah ada plan lain petang ni..so dah 4.30pm boleh la baring2 sat before ngadap kerja esok T_T..

Basically that's what happened throughout this month..cepat sungguh masa berlalu..and yeah of course la ada ja benda yang Ina tak share kat sini..too many things happen for me to keep track each and every detail..but at least benda yang I've listed above are those that I wish to remember for a looongg time..so yeah..until I have more "leisure" time to update you my small journey..see ya~!