wow...that is a long week~

I can't put down this book titled "Arfa's Adventure"... every pages of the book give me new view of life... this week has been superrr long for me...I don't know even know what actually happen...but one thing I'm sure of, I am so damn tired hahaha... so major events that happened during the week can be split into good and bad...so let's start with bad first... so last Thursday as I mentioned, I had to go to the office...but unlike last week..this week I went a bit late, and compared to last week the traffic is a bit heavy...so to get straight to the point...I had a small accident...which didn't affect much on me but the other party's car does scratch at the front bumper area...and due to my car being sturdy than I thought it will be... the other party wanted me to pay for the bill... after discussing with Abah, we decided to just lodge the police report since at the end of the day I may need to pay something...so when I reach office, everyone kinda worried about me but once they know that I'm fine, they seriously get straight to work...so that morning we did have a small meeting...but due to the accident instead of focusing on my work...I had to deal with the other party to make the police report...so 1 hour or so before lunch break I excuse myself to go to the police station...and yeah the annoying thing is throughout the day...there are always something that happen on the road that affect the way I drive...let's just say that day I feel like I'm taking JPJ test again... although at the end police conclude that I'm at fault but let us take that as another life lesson...So yeah~mark 3 September 2020 is the day Arfareena received her first fine.. now let's move on to the good thing...honestly, I don't know whether this can be considered as good news or not...but to be a positive person, I'll take it as a good news for now...last Wednesday, Wan Ling my A2, said that she has something to tell me...so we had a call..and during the call she said that she mentioned my name to our manager, Casandra as a suggestion for recurring staff...so recurring staff meaning that I will be selected to be in Ambank engagement again after this...I had a talk with my counsellor way before I joined this engagement...and one of the thing that she told me was, to be recurred in one of the big client in EY shows how good you are in your work...cause these big clients, they can be picky about who their auditor are...and we have a reputation to hold on too...so unless you did an excellent job you might not be selected as a recurring staff... so here is where I don't understand whether it is a good news or not...cause first of all when she offered me that, I haven't properly started doing anything at all apart from, yeah like I mentioned above, calling client and doing the same thing again and again...I did ask her, are you sure that I am able to perform my work well?... are you sure in picking me as the recurring staff is a good thing? she said everything can be teach and learn...so if I'm willing than she will inform our manager about it...she also mentioned that not everyone actually willing to stay...to be real honest...it is tough, there are a lot of things I don't actually understand how it works...but at the same time I can't deny the fact that having this opportunity can help boost my reputation and at the same time teach me a lot about auditing... maybe doing something I've done before will also helps in improving my confidence level and be more resolute in making a decision in the future... I cried actually that night...cause I don't know whether this is a blessing or a challenge...but what makes me agree to the offer is because, opportunity like this didn't come to you often...and I keep saying this, everything that happened...every path that is set in front of me has their own reason, has their own objectives and their own ending...so let's hope that I can continue giving my best to the team...that's all hahaha...I need to turn my laptop on again tonight to complete a web learning...so for now, I want to rest hahahahah...chau~

experience change you~

 It's interesting that no matter how we hate adventure, it always come and give you a whole lots of experience... and yes that experience will change you... but either for better or for worse, it is all for you to define... there may be experiences that help you to see how cruel life can be, but again there are experiences that shows you how magnificent life is, by never running out of colors to help you paint a picture in your journey... I always mentioned this principle that Abah taught me, take one step at a time... it is easy to understand cause by taking one step at a time you can see things more clearly and at the same time, you able to control your pace... but as I grow older, I find another meaning to this phrase... by taking a step at a time, it makes you value all the steps you have taken, to be where you are... cause every step you take is taken after considering all the consequences and possibilities to happen...of course you may have taken a wrong step once throughout your journey, but imagine if you didn't take those steps...will you reach where you are now?... and of course there are also situations where we wonder, should we be where we are now, is this the place we are aiming to when we took our first step?... thus, there are doubts in life that act as shadows and haunts when our guide light runs out of batteries haha... let me share a quote from "Dream High"..."all these 'if and 'what if'... if you keep going backwards like that, none of us should have ever been born"...it's simple, stop questioning when did you take the wrong step, instead seek for a step that can lead you to where you are going to... every one of us have their own goal/aim in life... and sometimes these aims changes as we move closer to it...so do we need to start from the starting line again just because we have a different goal now?...no! why?...cause you won't change your goal at the first place if you didn't go through all those steps...I am facing this problem called "fear of the unknown"...but I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one having this issue...but I'm trying my best to deal with it, and of course by taking a step at a time...another quote, this time from "Just between lovers(Rain or Shine)"...this is a conversation between a hard headed halmeoni(grandma) and a hot headed boy..."Living is a repetition of regrets and failures","Then what's the point of living?","It's to make even better regrets and mistakes, so don't be a scaredy-cat"...you might not get the message by reading it in a glance so let me share another quote from "Radio Romance"... "The post-it(memo pad) was a failed product while trying to make a strong adhesives. A failure that became a hit. Keep jumping into things that are failures so you can turn the failures into success"...get it? sometimes having regrets and mistakes aren't that bad...as I said earlier, those are all experiences that help you to create a lifetime journey for yourself... k I think let's stop sharing anymore quotes from dramas hahaha... but seriously, these are one of the reasons why I like watching such dramas, of course apart from the visuals and the cinematography, these drama can actually teach you a lot about life in general... that's why I don't understand people that judges such dramas without even watching them...or people who watch out of following the trend...at the end of the day they didn't gain anything from it... I'm not saying only kdrama has this elements... scripts that teach us about life,love,career can be found in most drama shown in TV...no matter what language it use...plot can be cliche in some drama...not just that, sometime they are super cringy to watch...but putting those things aside, a great scripts truly differentiate a quality drama from others... hahaha...why Arfa suddenly giving these random lectures today hahahah...I don't know, I just feel like each day, I learn something new without realising it... I hope that I can continue taking steps that guide me to where I want to be, and I hope all these lessons learnt and experiences gained help me in becoming a person that I want to be...hehehe...Hwaiting Nur Arfareena Arman!!!